Friday, April 25, 2008

The End Is Nigh

And so it is with wonderfully high spirits and a solid grasp of my education that I plow through today with high expectations.

Today is, after all, my final day of college.

Of course, it is a day of many finalities, so to speak. This is my last day of traditional college classes (next week is finals week, so it'll be a wonky schedule). Today is also my last day of any sort of classes in general. Traditional schooling - from primary to secondary to higher education - is behind me. Next Saturday I'll graduate, and from there on out, I'll lose the biggest focus of my life thus far: school itself.

It'll be weird to not have a backbone in my life - a stable, always-present element of my life that pretty much everything else revolves around. For as much as I complained about all the work that I had to devote to school, and for as much as I loved my summer, winter, and spring breaks, the truth is that I feel lost without school. Waking up every morning and going to classes for 17 years is all that I've known life to be about, and I know I'll miss it.

So with a beautiful 81-degree day ahead of me and just one final class to go to, I look forward to wrapping up my time at BGSU with a silent nod of appreciation, a short reflection on the past five years, and a long look at the future ahead. I'll be back soon enough with plenty more on my graduation.

Out.

Wednesday, April 23, 2008

Event Horizon, Draft 1

Here it is...

My short story (actually novella length by now), Event Horizon.

Several people have asked me for a completed copy of the entire story. Today I am hoping to satisfy their appetites for finality while also invoking interest in new readers to my world of fiction where dreams and reality meet.

Please be advised: this is the original first draft of Event Horizon as it was written over a two-year period and completed on September 11th, 2007. I have not touched this draft since last September.

What I have done, however, is formulate where draft two will go. In keeping with my most current creative writing education and technique, I plan to overhaul much of the story, which will essentially make most of what is in this draft obsolete. The biggest changes coming in draft two include new names for a few characters; full, fleshed-0ut backgrounds and histories for each character; and a stronger focus on the impact of dreams rather than the technicalities of describing dreams.

I hope you enjoy the old Event Horizon, and I more so hope that you look forward to draft two, whenever I get done with it.

Download below and enjoy!

Event Horizon (PDF)

B3 out.

Tuesday, April 22, 2008

Step By Step

On my agenda for the next two weeks:
  • Walk the dog numerous times
  • Bike at least twice, once on the Towpath trail and once on the Slippery Elm trail
  • Graduate from college
  • Prepare a tasty lunch/dinner for Colleen
  • Get through a rocky transition at Meijer as I go full-time
  • Improve my resume and job search - hardcore
  • Wrap up the first chapter of "Almost Gone" for my fiction workshop
  • Begin transitioning to a new design and focus for Critically Correct
Among those many to-do items, I also plan to publish the complete manuscript for "Event Horizon" on Critically Correct really soon. I've had a complete first draft of the story done and on my hard drive for about a year now, and in order to renew my interest in my fiction writing for the summer, I'm hoping to get feedback on it from anyone interested in reading it. Stay tuned for that.

In fact, given the perfect weather, my graduation, and an uncertain but positive future ahead, stay tuned for a lot... it's all downhill from here!

B3 out.

Monday, April 14, 2008

Memories Inspired by Music

As I approach my final days of my college career, I have found myself highly reflective of my past. Not only am I reflecting on my experiences in college over the past five years, but I'm looking back on my general secondary education as a whole: from the beginning of high school in 1999 through present day 2008.

Like many people, I'm sure, I relate memories to specific senses quite often. Although touch, smell, and sight are pretty big sensory flags for me, without a doubt hearing is the most powerful reminder of memories in my life. In fact, I'll cut the crap and get right to it: music is insanely powerful at marking specific landmarks in my life, and there's no other feeling quite like getting caught up in a song no sooner than I get caught up in a great memory from my past.

To this end, I have taken the time to conduct a little experiment. I loaded every song I own (about 2600 total) onto a Winamp playlist, randomized the list a few times, then took the first 20 songs on the list and related them to the most powerful memories that I have tied to each song. Below is that list. Enjoy the randomness, listed in no particular order.

Eminem - "My Name Is"
I originally purchased The Marshall Mathers LP in early 2000, and became an instant fan of Eminem. This was all the more amazing since I hated rap (I still do...). However, I instantly loved the album, and promptly pursued any of his other work, including The Slim Shady LP, which introduced me to this wonderful little song. I most remember this song as just that: a song that I really, really loved.

Steely Dan - "Bodhisttva"
This track takes me back better than ten years. My parents were big fans of Steely Dan, and when we got out first CD player in the early 90's (1992 maybe?), A Decade of Steely Dan was one of the first compact discs that we owned. It was played over and over and over in my house all through the decade. I personally fell in love with the album much later, around 1998. My strongest memory with this song brings back my Nintendo 64: I played lots of Top Gear Rally that year, and I always had this album playing nearby me for the duration that I perfected my power sliding technique.

Fuel - "Bittersweet"
I don't have any particularly strong memory attached to this song, although it did rotate on my playlist quite strongly throughout my later high school years, and I do recall humming it quite a bit during my computer science classes in high school. Oh, the looks I got.

Allman Brothers - "Jessica"
Of course I remember my dad playing this song in our CD player and bit on his guitar when I was a younger kid, and although I remember enjoying it back then, it wasn't until I first hammered out this song in Guitar Hero II that I became permanently attached to that little plastic guitar. Quite a recent memory by comparison to some, but certainly as everlasting as any.

Switchfoot - "Gone"
I enjoy Switchfoot quite a bit, and a couple of years ago I enjoyed this song particularly - quite bouncy and not very threatening. Oddly enough, I had a great idea for a music video, and really wanted to embark on a personal video project... so I tried to. I wrote up a complete script, designed sets on paper, crafted a full line of characters, and even went as far as to post "job openings" for anyone interested in helping make the video. Within a three months of this process, my interest waned and I moved on to other things. I'll always have the original script, though... so maybe someday it'll get made!

The Killers - "Mr. Brightside"
If my Top 5 list of my favorite songs was expanded, this would be just about Number 6 or 7. I. Simply. Love. It. My only strong memory attached to this song is just what's been said: I have always loved this song, and I can not get over how great it actually is. Okay, I can't cheat like that... I do have one memory attached: one day atMeijer it started playing, and Peggy (our Grocery Orderwriter ) heard it and was like "what the hell kind of music is this?" I sat in silence, staring at her for a few minutes... kind of saddened. Damn generational gap.

Limp Bizkit - "No Sex"
Before I ever enjoyed making love to anyone, sex was an enigma to me: and as a teenager at Otsego High, therefore it was also highly desired. So long before I ever dove into sex, I listened to this song and frequently wondered if this would ever happen to me: the over sex-ed relationship that had little other meaning. Luckily, it hasn't happened yet with any of my past girlfriends.

Buckcherry - "You"
I've been tempted to write about Lacey here: after all, she was the number-one reason for me loving this song. Although Buckcherry have always generally been hard rockers, this song was a rather soothing change of pace. My most vivid recall of this song: the Towpath Bike Trail. Buckcherry was a regular in my CD player during all those months in 2002 that I lost a ton of weight.

Reba McEntire - "Fancy"
Nowadays I look at this song as a guilty pleasure. I'm not a big fan of modern day country music (terribly unoriginal), but some older late-80's and early-90's country always perked my interests, and I do remember that this song was one of the first to help me paint very vivid images of the so called "plot" in my head during every listen. Not much of a memory, I know, but nonetheless a memory.

Avril Lavigne - "Naked"
Hello! Brittany!? Point in case, I was obsessed with Avril back in my late high school years, and I particularly remember listening this song repeatedly on my way to my nightly 5pm shift atMeijer after school during the late spring of my senior year at Otsego . I also remember hearing how much an old friend of mine, Brittany, loved this song as much as myself, and I have always attached our wonderful friendship to this song.

Steely Dan - "Deacon Blues"
Just like Bodhisttva above, I have many fond memories of racing about Top Gear Rally on the N64 while listening to this song, among many others. In particular, the desert racetrack stands out in my mind... I found the smooth, calming curves of that particular track to be a solid match to the creamy exterior jazz rock of this song.

Candlebox - "Far Behind"
Seriously? See here. Oh, and also see here, circa 2007. This song has always been one of my all-time favorite rock tracks, and my strongest memory is that of Lacey: moving on and moving out from a bitter and unwanted break-up. Was I left far behind by her? I certainly think so, but I'm all the better for it. Lame.

The Slip - "Children of December"
I discovered The Slip thanks to their inclusion of the song Even Rats in Guitar Hero, and bought their album Eisenhower shortly thereafter. The first track off this CD, Children of December, was instantly tied to my best friend at that point, Colleen - now my girlfriend, of course. She certainly is a child of December, and she's the first thing I think of whenever I hear this song.

Bush - "Little Things"
Two big memories here: I discovered this song long after I had become intimately familiar with all that Bush had to offer from my earlier years with their music. So when I finally discovered this song, I listened to it incessantly for weeks on end. My other memory? Laura Kolpien - I remember very vividly the day that she was at my house last summer going through my music collection for songs to pick out, and when she discovered this song, her face lit up as brightly as I've ever seen it - she was quite excited about this song. Random? Surely!

Tom Petty - "Mary Jane's Last Dance"
Oddly enough, this song brings back memories of the Fuel concert that I went to at Headliners in 2004. They covered this song somewhere near the middle of their set, and while I was unfamiliar with it then, my girlfriend was thrilled to hear it... I distinctly remember being made fun of for not knowing this song. I downloaded it the next day.

Eric Johnson - "Cliffs of Dover"
A rather new song in my list of "all time favorites" but certainly important to me: Cliffs of Dover is to my Guitar Hero III experiences asFreebird is to my Guitar Hero II experiences. Everyone has to have a favorite song to play on each game, and this was it for GHIII.

Saint Dragon - "Misato"
My strongest memory with this song is hearing it for the first time. Saint Dragon is a rock band out of South Africa with a unique sound to them, and after a two year hiatus without getting any new tracks from them, Misato came out of no where and proved to me that Saint Dragon is ranked among some of my favorite bands.

Elton John - "Tiny Dancer"
Ah yes, 1998. What a year. Maybe it was 1997. Doesn't matter. My family and I took a vacation to Washington DC one of those summers (I was definitely in middle school, so make that 1998). I was just beginning an obsession with girls that I did not quite yet understand. I had a ton of crushes at school, but this family vacation let me get on the road and meet all kinds of people, and for all of the car ride Elton John's Greatest Hits I and II were my albums of choice, and Tiny Dancer got played more than any other track. In particular, I remember one of our hotels had a swimming pool on the roof of the building, and I remember very specifically swimming for several hours with a cute blond girl who was irresistible at the time. FOr a few hours in that pool, a total stranger was my tiny dancer. I've since become a little less dramatic when I meet total strangers.

Nickelback - "Woke Up This Morning"
I was in love with Nickelback's album Silver Side Up just in time for my EverQuest obsession to pick up in my early years of high school. That said, I have tied particular songs to particular zones of EQ, and this song is particular to the Butcher Block Mountains zone. Ah yes, giant spiders are fun.

Oleander - Why I'm Here
I don't know much about Oleander now and knew even less about them in 2000 when I saw them open for my first concert, Tantric, in Detroit. I do remember this song, however, and whenever I play it I'm instantly reminded of the pot-filled, candle-lit, moshing hole that was The Majestic in downtown Detroit. Oleander was awesome, but Tantric rocked quite well that night.

And that's it. I choose 20 songs because I knew 10 would not be enough. Now that I've worked my way through 20, I wish I could have done 30. Or maybe 50. Or maybe 500, or all 2600-ish songs in my collection. Some songs have better memories tied to them than others, but the random-nature of this particular list made it interesting to dig back in my past. I look forward to trying lists like this in the future, so stay tuned.

B3 out.

Saturday, April 05, 2008

When The World Heats Up

... And one day I left Meijer, and my life forever changed.

It's impossible to ignore how important this year is for me. My mind has been constantly churning with thoughts, worries, and excitement over the future: how will the remainder of the semester go? What will it feel like to never have to go to school again? How will job hunting go? What about my loan repayments? I'm almost so distracted by these questions that I'm having trouble focusing on my life at the moment.

So what does Meijer have to do with anything? Well today I got a firm notion of how serious of a change graduation is. Lacey is moving to Columbus tomorrow, and today was her last day at Meijer. I feel bad - although not for the same reasons that many might think...

From early high school to a relationship to outright war (we really argue a lot at Meijer), she's been a pretty constant friend in my life for quite some time. So it does pain me a bit to know that the last two years has been spent with us fighting and feuding a lot more than we should have. I usually let jealousy and my past get in the way of being a good friend to her. I wish I didn't let that happen. Five years ago we laughed when thinking about "when we grow up" - like where we will be, who we will be with, and how things will generally go. That moment is here for a lot of my friends in many ways. Lacey is a sort of finality for me: her departure to Columbus pushes her out of my life for good, closing quite a long chapter in my life.

Of course, I have already started a new chapter: one where I'm quickly aspiring to be a serious computer engineer, a successful creative writer, and an active, on-the-go person who puts friends and family first, while always maintaining a highly-positive outlook on life. This semester has meant a lot to me in terms of building these things: I'm doing great in my CS classes, I have a solid start on a potential novel that my workshop class has thus-far loved, I'm capable of sustaining myself on the road, and I have a wonderful girlfriend and parents who fully support me.

Despite inevitable hardships in the near future - loan payments, job hunting, moving out, etc. - I'm keeping a positive spin on my future and to be honest... I'm looking forward to it. Just a few more great weeks of school to go, and then I'm free.

Oh yeah, and it's bloody fucking beautiful outside today. I'm off to walk the dog.

B3 out.

Friday, April 04, 2008

A Blast From the Past

Quick, random update...

In trying to become more serious in my video uploads on YouTube, I have uploaded an old, classic video of mine from all the way back in high school. It is a summary of my experiences at Otsego High School, so check it out if you have time.

Never Comedown on YouTube

Out.

Tuesday, April 01, 2008

Why 2009 Will Be Painful

In just four short weeks I graduate from BGSU... at least, I was supposed to.

Although I'm ready to wrap up my Computer Science degree (Creative Writing minor), I'm considering that it's also time to think about the rest of my life on a more serious basis, so I've decided to head to my college office today to change my major... to Women's Studies. I've kept quiet about my fascination with this field of study for quite some time, but I think it's time that I get my life on the right track.

I'm not sure how to take the further three years-worth of classes that I must wade through, or the further $30,000 that I have to pour into this endeavor, but I feel that I'm on the right path now. I hope my girlfriend can support me the most through all this!

And in the spirit of today, something totally awesome.

B3 out.