Boo for Work!

After three very quick days off work, I'm back to Meijer tomorrow... ugh...

Which brings me to a good point. I'm fascinated by time and the human mind. The movement, the flow, the experience of time, and how it affects and is affected by the human mind just boggles me.

How can three wonderful days off work seemingly pass so quickly, yet three days of work will take me ages to slog through? I'm sure many people would reply with "it's a fun factor thing" - in other words, that which we enjoy the most, we can never get enough of, and that which we are annoyed by (Meijer!), will slow us down.

Dreams are an intermediate step - what seems to last for days in a fantasy world may only be a few minutes, meaning that time is something that is merely perceived. Time only passes as quickly as the human brain processes it.

To that end, I suggest that control of time - or control of the mind's perception of time - is one key to making my day-to-day experiences more enjoyable. What if eight hours at Meijer seemed like a few moments of my day gone by, and the remaining seven waking hours of my day seemed like an entire weekend?

This concept and possibility intrigues me in ways that I can't begin to explain. I plan to study this further, and I'll share with you my results.

Teary-Eyed

Want to see a grown man cry?

Just play "Zelda's Lullaby" as it was orcastrated for "Ocarina of Time" in 1998. It's so beautiful...

The Question

Ask yourself this question:

Would you ever date someone even though it would hurt your best friend to the point of questionable insanity?

That's what I thought...

Yay!

Three days off of work... yay!

Although I also started my online summer course, "Computers in Society" today...

I'm expecting another beautiful 'A' coming up.

Yay, New Poem!

A new poem:

Tornado Heart
Brandon Bruno

I've been here before, in this lost and lonely place
realizing how much of my life seems a waste
wondering what's next for me and my heart
waiting for the one I love to tear it apart
does my mind wonder too much?
or is it too strong of a hunch
that while we sit here,
for all that I fear
she's leaving
my life?

Inspired by real feelings...

Looking On

"You want everything to be just like
The stories that you read but never write.
You gotta learn to live
and live and learn.
You gotta learn to give
and wait your turn,
or you'll get burned..."

- The Raconteurs, "Together"

There's very little I can say at this point. My life seems as if though the its slate has been wiped clean and I am left with a lifetime of decisions to make. I'm about a year from completing college, and once I'm done there, the rest of my life will begin... It's becoming a scary thing.

And here I am, a new man. Where to go from here? I asked myself this question, and then asked another question:

When I die, what do I want my friends and family to remember about me? Will I be an accomplished person, or an over-emotional creep my whole life? Rich or poor? Single, married, kids? Who the hell knows, so here's how I want people to look back on me and see:

Brandon Bruno, deceased, was known best for the following:

- Being a loving husband and father of two boys and a daughter. He leaves his wife of forty-two years behind.

- Starting as a systems programmer out of college, he moved on shortly after to start his own company, ACC, for whom he leaves to his best friend.

- He published two novels, including the best-selling "Meltdown: A Survivors Story." His life work, he spent two years in seclusion to finish his masterpiece.

- Although sometimes angry, and sometimes jealous, Brandon overcame his greatest stresses and fears to do what he always felt was right; not only to make the world a better place, but for the love of his wife.

Well, here's hoping, anyway. Looks like I have a busy life ahead of me. Better get to work.

Woo-Hoo!!

I'm going to Soak City, bitches!!! Woo-Hoo!!!!!!!!

Getting Over It

I've just had a moment of inspiration; of awe. I've spent the past 8 days at Meijer -- working my ass off. This being my first day off in ages, I feel like no amount of time can satisfy me. I'm so fed up with slaving away at Meijer. My mind needs to be freed.

I'm at a loss for words. My life has suddenly become useless -- but only in feeling. Although I lack the motivation to entertain myself outside of video games, I also lack the motivation to free my mind from the rut it's currently in. I don't feel as if anything in my life can please me. Don't get me wrong; video games are a wonderful thing, a form of entertainment that truly takes my mind into another place, as they always have. Problem is, that place is quickly becoming almost too comfortable, as if I may begin to neglect my short- and long-term goals in my life. I've wanted to do so much this summer, from losing weight to finishing my short stories, and thus far, nothing is getting done.

It's easy to blame Lacey. She's always been the perfect distraction for me. But I'm lying to myself by saying "it'll be all right in the end." For as much as I say I hate drama, I'm the chief cause of it. I can't do this anymore. I'm looking for a way to free my mind to become the person I truly am.

Oddly enough, I've been looking to my dreams for answers to this. Just a few days ago I had a dream about a person that I've known for what seems like forever, but never really got to know. I've recently begun to take notice in her, however, and have realized that she's so strikingly similar to myself in terms of life's expectations, bumps, bruises, and quirks.

I think more than anything right now, it's good to know that someone out there has the same frustrations and sediments I do.

Losing My Mind

Man am I burnt out.

I'm in the middle of an eight-day work week, and it's killing me. Up at 7am, at Meijer by 8am, home at 5pm, in bed by midnight. Those seven free hours I do have, like right now as I write this, seem to go by so fast that it shouldn't even matter that I have them free. I could probably be at Meijer for twenty-four hours a day and I'd never know the difference.

Ah well, life sucks, then you die.

Ask me sometime about a funny-as-shit email that Katy from work sent me... I'll gladly forward it on to you if you feel like laughing.

With that, I'm off to perhaps take a nap or do something... constructive with my life...

Shoutouts!

I'm taking this opportunity to put some big shoutouts to one of my favorite peeps:

Hi, Colleen!!! I hope you're having a blast in Japan... drop me a line if you get a chance.

It's Coming

The Nintendo Wii, probably the most interesting of the three next-gen consoles, will also feature some relatively cheap classic games:

http://www.neowin.net/index.php?act=view&id=33558

New Stuff

I've discovered a wonderful new site, www.okcupid.com.

Although primarily a dating/matchmaking site, I've found it's format, free-ness, and unique spin on the dating/friendship world to be very interesting indeed. It's worth checking out, as the thousands of quizzes and personality tests are fun on their own.

http://www.okcupid.com

Long Time

Been a while, hasn't it?

I've been busy. I really have been.

My five-day vacation from work is in full-swing... and man is it nice. I'm going to hate going back next week.

Lacey's birthday has come and gone. Through it all, myself and some of my friends have discovered that alcohol makes her a less-likeable person, rather than more fun to be around. Ouch.

In an hour I'm leaving to meet an old friend in Maumee for a wonderful lunch down by the Maumee.

Overdue Meetings

What a week I have ahead of me. Between Lacey's birthday, Brent's wedding, and now, my most anticipated event, a reunion with Aryn, I'm looking to have one of the best weeks in recent memory. Yay.

Half-Life 2: Episode One Review

It's about time I move away from constantly bitching about my life and put this blog to good use... which means it's time for a game review!

There isn't anything else that I can say about Half-Life. The original 1998 game was, quite simply, the best interactive experience to come along since 1985's launch of Super Mario Bros. on the NES. (This is debatable by just a few months, as "Ocarina of Time" for the N64 hit shelves a few months later, stealing that title). Just as Nintendo reinvented video games and gave raise to a dying industry, Valve brought the first person shooter - the staple genre of the PC platform - and said "we will not stand still."

The rest is history. Gordan Freeman is a name well-known to almost any dedicated PC gamer, and there isn't a single first-person shooter today that can't trace some element of gameplay or presentation back to Half-Life.

With Half-Life 2, Valve modernized not only their technology, but their story and gameplay as well. Although Half-Life is seen as a revolutionary product, Half-Life 2 tweaks, tinkers, and maximizes the formula established in 1998, creating yet again the most genre-defining first person shooter to date.

Half-Life 2: Episode One is Valve's stab at episodic gaming content. As where Half-Life 2 was a six-year development ordeal that nearly killed fans in anticipation, Episode One is a quick shot in the arm to fans a mere 18 months after HL2's release.

Indeed, it may just be better than Half-Life 2 itself.

By reusing artwork, models, and technology, Valve was able to focus on creating new story, gameplay, and (admittedly) new technology for the release of Episode One. Indeed, the story cliff-hanger at the end of HL2 left a lot of loose ends. Episode One answers a few old questions, but creates a whole lot more at the same time.

Without spilling too many story details, by the end of Episode One, players will finally have a grasp on the overall Half-Life story arc. It's also apparent that we are more than halfway through the overall Half-Life saga.

Once again Valve uses technology to enhance gameplay, all the while improving visuals with HDR and, more importantly, huge performance enhancements. I noticed my average framerates on my Athlon 64 1.8 GHz, 1GB DDR-400, ATi Radeon x700 (256MB, 128-bit) machine improved by about 20 to 40% - a huge increase. This performance increase is worth the purchase of Episode One alone.

The four-to-six hours that Valve advertises the gameplay as is overstated. I blew through the episode in three and a half my first time through, although being an experienced Half-Lifer, that's to be expected. Not to say that the game is easy... I just know how to Gravity Gun my way through most levels pretty quickly. Enemy encounters have gotten harder as well, especially when the lights went out and the HEV Suit flashlight becomes your friend.

All in all, the story elements, character interaction (voice acting and NPC animation is second to none), gameplay additions, and... well, it's more Half-Life, add up to an episodic purchase that's well worth it's $19.99 price tag. Seasoned Half-Life players may feel burned by the price, especially if they blow through the five chapters as fast as I did, but be rest assured: some serious shit is going to go down in the next two episodes, and Episode One is worth the ride.

Slow Sunday

Is today Sunday? Is it Monday? Wednesday? Thursday?

I sure as hell don't know... the days all blend together for me. Tomorrow is yet another day of work for me. Yuck.

Anywho, in less than a week I'll be packing up to head down to Cincy for Brent's wedding. I'll provide updates of it all next weekend, so be prepared.

I'm off to play some Oblivion.

Weekend!

And here I am. The weekend is here, and for some reason, I'm pumped. Despite the fact that I work for the next four days, I'm very excited to be here.

I gots lots of stuff coming up, so here it is:

• Lacey's B-Day this coming Tuesday night
• Brent's wedding on Saturday
• My sister's graduation party next Sunday.
• Soak City on June 23rd.
• Cedar Point on July 9th.
• Summer Bash on July 14th.

Bitchin'.

Now I'm off to placey Half-Life 2: Episode One.

Fuck yeah.